Little Golden Books Present:

What is the Meaning of Laota?
by Dudes.

Let’s read it now!

“What is the meaning of Laota, and what the does it have to do with me?” This is a question scholars have pondered throughout the ages. Twenty-four odd years ago, scientologists noticed this passage in the Apocrypha:

“Josh 5:10: At the end of the nineteen-hundreth and eighty-first year, there will be a time of crisis, of worlds hanging in the balance. And in this time shall come a maiden. She will be born unto the Orange County, and the stars themselves will hide!”.

Clearly, this worried scientologists in the Orange County area, but when they made their findings public, no one listened, mostly because scientologists are full of crap. And so this passage went unnoticed until 1997, when Mystery Force Five started a cult based on the prophesy, the “Cult of Laota and Four Bald Guys”. As it turns out, the “Bald Guys” were actually The Monkees, and so the cult was largely ignored. But the prophesy still bothered some biblical historians. What is Laota, anyway? Is it dangerous? Does it taste good on a cracker? Can it be trained to go on the paper?

Yes, yes, and no!

We’ve recently discovered the “Laota” is not a thing, but a very horrible person! How did you get to her bio without knowing that? *shakes head* A question for another time. What’s important is that we tell you who Laota French is, and how that affects this year’s millet crop. Laota is an Odinist, a writer, webmaster, poet, friend to all, and something about leading the Pope into Mexico. I forget. And she actually has no bearing on millet.

Well, nothing you can taste. ::crazy::